What If?

happy copy two
freeimages.com / Jason Antony

Are you happy with your body? Do you think some areas need improvement? Do you ever wish you had a “little less here” and a “little more there?”

Stop and think about the design of your body. The specifications. The engineering. The maintenance functions. Then imagine what you could look like if you had rolled off an assembly line.

What if someone read the design specs wrong and put your ears on your neck? The mouth would have a higher position in life than the ears, and if you think talk is cheap now, just you wait. If your ears were on your neck, how would you wear your glasses?

What if you were assembled on a Monday morning and the parts person gave you two sets of eyes—one set at the front of the head and one set at the back? Just think how peeved you’d get if you saw someone talking behind your back.

What if the design specs said arms had to be attached from the waist instead of the shoulders? How would women carry their shoulder bags? From their ears on their neck?

What if you had two mouths and one ear? Two mouths would be great if you’re a lobbyist: you could argue both sides of an issue and collect double pay. If you had just one ear, how would you let it go in one ear and out the other?

What if you had two faces? Would you do one face in “day colors,” the other in “night colors?” Would being two-faced give you a split personality?

What if you had no nose? What would you keep to the grindstone? If you’re a busybody, you might find it difficult nosing around.

What if your feet were put on backwards? Would you still take one step forward and two steps backward? What if your hands and feet got switched?

What if the “what if’s” really were? What if we had to choose between the “what if’s” and a “little less here” and a “little more there?”

What if we’re fine just the way we are? Lumps and all?

Copyright © 2017 Marion Amberg

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